Is The Grass Greener?

Did you know that there was a study done in England recently that indicated that Facebook was to blame in 20% of all divorces?

I have been wondering what my Facebook is saying about me and if I need to be worried that one of my old boyfriends will want to 'hook up' with me. 

So I thought we could analyze what my Facebook says about me.  Here's a few sample status updates that my old flames would be able to see:

Update:

• Wendy McNees Vincent is celebrating 20 years of being married! Who would've thought it was possible?

Analysis:

• This update can be analyzed to mean that I am MARRIED.  That I'm probably not looking for a boyfriend.  It also alludes to the fact that being married to me for a long amount of time is difficult.

Update:

• Wendy McNees Vincent: At what age do you get to stop doing job charts for your kids?

Analysis:

• This lady comes with children.  Children who need job charts to ensure they do jobs - children might be a little unruly.

Update:

• Wendy McNees Vincent loves that it's 60 degrees in St. George!

Analysis:

• Hooking up with Wendy will require trips to warm weather places.  This could get a little expensive.

Update:

• Wendy McNees Vincent :-) for Saints, :-( for Austin Collie

Analysis:

• What an awesome chicka!  She likes football.  I bet she LOVES football even more while watching it by herself while her husband / boyfriend cleans the house because he doesn't like football.

Update:

• Wendy McNees Vincent hates printer ink, printers, ink refillers, anything to do with trying to print a simple document!
• Wendy McNees Vincent has been on hold with Smith's Fresh Rewards 'hotline' for 15 minutes now. I feel slightly dumb for holding this long . . . . .
• Wendy McNees Vincent hides gifts so well -- even I can't find them. Poor Jeff is missing his new wallet I bought for him. . . .

Analysis:

• This lady STRUGGLES!!

Update:

• Wendy McNees Vincent:  I have finally covered my grey hairs and trimmed my crazy hair. No ponytail on Sunday to church.

Analysis:

• This is one OLD gray-haired momma who probably has sagging boobs and floppy triceps.  Note to self: Avoid seeing her NAKED!

Well, well . . . .looks like I"m in no danger of hooking up on Facebook!

But I'm heart broken that there have been some friends and family who have hooked up and ended up getting lost in their lives. 

Call me if you think you might be headed down this road.  I'll help you with a quick analysis of Facebook updates so you can make a more informed choice!