Lieu Lieu Skip to My Lieu

My apologies in advance for the continuing saga of "Wendy Goes Back to School", but this whole experience is rocking my mind.

Yesterday when I attended my 2nd day of 'classes' it started out rather poorly. I found that at age 37 I was not capable of finding my own seat in the class. Apparently this instructor believes in the "assigned seating" methodology of making you feel inferior. (Puh-lease, assigned seating in a room that seats 50 when there's only 5 of us there . . ) Man! I have taken for granted, these past 19 years, the ability to sit wherever I want. But I triumphed anyway, since I strolled to my assigned seat with the air of confidence that says, "This is really where I wanted to be anyway!"

In addition to assigned seating I found this class to be a men's club of loan officers who have been forced to endure continuing education classes. One gentleman proclaimed, "I already know everything." after showing up 40 minutes late to class whereupon he also announced he was late "because I was smoking crack." Good one, pal . . . (quick note, but that reference has just upped my blog rating again!)

So what did I really learn yesterday at class? The instructor asked that I try to become more comfortable with using the words "in lieu of". Yeah, when reading aloud a section from a form, I thought I could skip some words. In the process of doing so, I skipped the words "in lieu of" which the instructor took to mean that I was uncomfortable using those words. (Hey, buddy, I'm just uncomfortable role-playing filling out a loan form and wanted it to go as fast as possible) Regardless, this now leaves me with the home work assignment to become more comfortable with these words in my vocabulary. I've been practicing and here's some examples:

• Josh,I realize that you think you can play Guitar Hero in lieu of chores, but promptly cleaning your room would be more appropos (I'm using the previous instructors pet word from Tuesday too).
• In lieu of cereal this morning we are going to Gandolfo's for a Chaz Bagel . . .Yum!
• Who in the world decided to have rain and clouds the last two days in lieu of sunshine?!
• I wish I could put dust bunnies in my gas tank in lieu of gasoline so I could afford to get to the zoo today.
• I will accept Diet Pepsi in lieu of Diet Coke (just a helpful note for all of you)

Home work done!